Monday, March 29, 2010

old man blues

I’m going to take a stab at blogging. Maybe I’ll keep up with it this time. I always have ideas rolling around in my head but I never seem to write them down. Maybe typing them will be easier, and whoever wants to read it can read it.
It’s hard for me to believe that I’m a few weeks away from having a year of college completed. I have to say, it has exceeded my expectations. I have met some amazing people. I have learned new things. I have been involved in new things. I have found out more about myself. I have made my best friends. I have albums of pictures that beautifully illustrate the journey so far. Thank you Lord for this experience.
It hasn’t all been peaches and cream, however. I have been exposed to things that I haven’t been exposed to in the past, I have seen friends and loved ones hurting, and I have been hurt myself. I’m certainly not in Kansas anymore. Kansas being home sweet Somerville, of course. But it’s the struggles in life that give us strength, and even in the midst of them, I am thankful.
I have been thinking about my dad a lot lately. Maybe it’s because I just flat miss him. I miss my whole family, but dad has been on my heart these past few days specifically. Sometimes, all that a girl wants in the world is just a hug from her dad. Good thing I’ll see him soon, because I’m in desperate need of one.
I hate to imagine life without my dad. I am who I am today because of the influence he has on me. I wish I could be more like him. He has the ability to make me laugh in any situation; he is one of the smartest people I know; I talk to him when I need to feel comfort and calm. He is my rock, and I love him so very much. He taught me how to ride a bike, how to throw a baseball (I don’t have any bothers, and I happen to really enjoy baseball), the value of a dollar, the importance of education, and how to become a well-rounded, respected woman. I strive to make him proud.
Sometimes I wish my dad was right around the corner. He gives the best advice for any situation, no matter how silly or serious. He’s quick on his feet and he’s got the best sense of humor in the world.
I feel like I've needed my dad these past few days. I always feel like I need my parents. I couldn't have asked for better ones. My mother is amazing. I could write a book about the relationship I have with my mother, and I may do that.
But I can't exactly pinpoint why I just feel the need to be with dad lately. So since he's not here right now, I'm going to give him a call. I'm going to listen to Jason Mraz and Creedence Clearwater Revivial, turn the TV on ESPN, and chew some plain extra bubble gum. It's the closest thing I have to having him here at this moment.

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